Kids Are Like Bad College Roommates

The more I’m around my kids, the more I feel like I’m back in college. My children remind me an awful lot about what it was like to live with my old roommates.

Dishes. My kids leave their dishes wherever they took their last bite of food. Whether it be the couch, the floor in front of the television or the kitchen table, it’s easy to figure out where my child or former college roommates ate their last meal. And why is there a plate in the bathroom? Gross.

Cups. How many cups do my kids need at bedtime? If you use my daughter’s room as an example, the answer is nine. Cups are stacked up pyramid style on the nightstand making it look like a carnival game. Add beer cans in place of water cups and place them all over the house, and it’s exactly what college looked like.

Clothes. I’m beginning to think my kids don’t change their clothes, they shed them. Clothes just sort of fall off their bodies. This “shedding” is often in the kitchen, the hallway or on the stairs, but rarely near clothes hampers in bedrooms. And kids and college roommates: Can we all agree to stop shoving socks in the couch cushions?

Food thieves. Have you ever tried to hide a snack from your kids? The Girl Scout cookies we bought this year lasted approximately three days, and we bought six boxes! I remember trying to hide the occasional delicacy when I was back in college. I’d spend $8 of my $20 weekly grocery budget on Oreos, only to come home at night and find my roommate asleep on a pile of cookie crumbs.

Yes, living with kids is a lot like living with bad college roommates, however there is one advantage of cohabitating with the latter. At least you only had to live with your roommate for a year before you could agree to part ways!

-Pete

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