Ghost Pooper

Warning! What you are about to read pertains to paranormal activity. This is a true story of my encounters with the supernatural.

It’s not that our entire house is haunted, just the bathrooms. For the last few months we have been sharing our bathrooms with a ghost. Not just any ghost, but a ghost pooper. Our beloved ghost pooper sneaks into the bathroom, does his/her business, and leaves without a sound (of the toilet flushing).

The ghost pooper never visited our house during the first five years of living here, but now shows up approximately three times a week.

These past two weeks the ghost pooper started making appearances during the day time! The ghost pooper may be on some type of vacation or spring break. Coincidentally, my daughter has also been home on vacation for the last two weeks.

The ghost pooper has other confusing behaviors as well. Although not polite enough to flush the toilet, she (at least I’m guessing it’s a she at this point) washes her hands and promptly throws the hand towel on the floor when done. Other behaviors are inconsistent from incident to incident. Bathroom fan sometimes on, sometimes off. Toilet seat mostly left up, but occasionally put down, allowing for an even greater surprise when you lift up the lid.

What am I supposed to do about this? How does one trap a ghost pooper?

Help me.

-Pete

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